feeling Januaryish

I remember in Eads, January's were always the most insistently dull months. In Jackson they were invariably cold, and rainy, devoid of snow days, entirely.
In Louisville: sunny and the type of cold that makes my ears ache.


this week {so far}:
- I sent my manuscript for critique to two poets I respect, admire, and somewhat fear.
- I am waiting
- with trepidation.


in other news... i worked-out everyday since the start of the year (and hope to continue), and started counting calories (monotonous, but helpful) in a little scheme to lose 5lbs this month. Mostly, it is something to do in a very boring month. But I do feel stronger and healthier than I did over the holidays, so there is that.


I also..
*watched through season 1 of Doctor Who.
*ate Mexican food three meals in a row
*wrote two poems
*read the last of three light-reading books H sent me.
*tried out a new recipe: baked potato soup

glory be!


i had the strangest dream monday night.
i was borrowing a typewriter and somehow got honey over all the keys. i tried to clean it up before the owner got back but ended up hiding it instead. my entire family was at this house, where i borrowed the typewriter. we left from there to go to a place where B and i tried out for the marines (this involved a maze, the creek behind the house where i grew up, a swimming pool, kittens, and snakes). we were going to pass, but then a girl gave B a bloody lip, so i punched her in the face and knocked out her tooth! then B and i realized that if we join the military, we might get sent overseas. so we decided to quit, and go back to the lobby where our family was waiting for us.

interpretations welcome.


I realized, this Wednesday, that I've been worrying, plotting, planning, but I hadn't been praying. I hadn't been praying hardly at all about it. And truly there is Nothing I can do that is more affective than praying. So I am now, fervently, in the morning, noon, and night.


that's all for now


  1. Agh! I'm so irritated. I left you a really long comment on this with an awesome dream interpretation and everything...but it got deleted =(

    I'll do my best to recreate...

    Dream interpretation: Your writing is deliciously beautiful (like honey) but you're worried that other people won't accept it (honey on a typewriter is unacceptable), so you hide it (hiding the typewriter). Which, isn't true, because you don't hide your writing...you publish regularly...so I admit this is a faulty interpretation. :) But I like the part about your writing being deliciously beautiful! Because that part is very true =)

    Also, I completely relate to the worrying instead of praying. I actually realized that during a phone call with my mom a couple of days ago. I'm a worrisome researcher. And I don't PRAY. I need to be praying for you, too. I'll email (or handwrite a letter) you more about this, later, when it's my turn to write. :)

    Also, emailzme about the cryptic first part...if you feel like it?

  2. hmm interesting dream interpretation =) i used to love reading psychology books about dream interpretation when i was in high school, but they all seemed to contradict each other.

    email sent~!

  3. I like Heather's dream interpretation.

    I think it's funny you're counting calories because it gives you something to do, among other things. I do it every day. It's pretty much a habit. Of course, it doesn't mean that I actually meet my goal (ESPECIALLY since being pregnant), but it's a great practice to help you lose those 5 pounds! Good for you for exercising every day!

  4. thats awesome that you've been able to make a habit of it! i hope i can--besides it giving me something to do in a very boring January (whilst Bryan takes accelerated Classes), its healthier! i do feel a lot better when i'm paying more attention to what i eat, so hopefully i can keep it up =)